Quotes from UVA Computer Science professors
About classes or teaching
- "While you're filling out your evaluations, think about how nice I've
been."
- "Only those of us who like to torment students are left at the
University."
- "You want to remember this, because it's one of those rare things that
makes a reasonable exam question."
- "I'm paid to be dictatorial in these matters."
- Student: "So, you're not going to tell me how it works?"
Professor: "You didn't ask me how it works."
Student: "Now I'm asking."
Professor: "I won't tell you!"
- "Three hours of classes is more than I can take even if it is
interesting."
- "No one is going to fail the course...unless you turn in a final exam
with pornographic poetry on it or something."
- "Education has nothing to do with teaching people -- it's trying to find
classrooms and such."
- "We're renting the open area at Fashion Square Mall. We get in right
after Santa leaves and classes have to be over before the Easter Bunny
arrives."
- Referring to the final exam: "Make sure you have seven fun-filled
pages."
- "I have to take an oxygen break here."
- "Ooh, there's a piece of design! You immediately flunk the course."
- Student: "I can't give you a rigorous answer."
Professor: "Then give an unrigorous one."
Student: "Okay ... no."
- "Office hours? For a T.A.? Pft, forget that!"
- Responding to a complaint about a tough exam: "Damn small price to pay
for knowledge."
- Stated within days of one another:
- Take-homes are the only logical way to test you.
- Take-homes are a waste of time.
- "After all, the purpose of the exercises is to make sure we all have the
same definitions...mine."
- "We just canonized my solution as opposed to your solution."
- "`The user structure' is the answer to the rest of the book --- except
for question 3."
- Speaking about a pop quiz: "I could just ask them their name. Some of
them would still lose points, though."