I am not an adult film star. No link, as the link Google finds is sometimes not worksafe due to explicit banner ads. This guy turns out to be the third most popular match for "Michael DeLong."
I am not the Dr Michael Delong who directrs the Large Rivers Study Center at Winona State University in Winona MN, but I wish him all the best getting his little girl out of China, and congratulate him on finishing the Lakes Run 8K and the Firecracker Run 10k last June and July in Big Lake and Excelsior, MN. I ran a couple of 5Ks last year, but not in Minnesota.
I am not the Michael DeLong who just finished the fourth grade under the watchful eye of Mr Meinbress in a place called Burton Valley, but coincidentally I did see black bears and go to Hawaii (Maui, even) last year. Of the two of us I am the one who did not read any Judy Blume books in the last year. This Mike DeLong turns out to be a (or possibly the) son of famed Berkeley economist J. Bradford DeLong.
If you've ever been to Pelham, NY and talked to Pelham Village Administrator Michael DeLong you weren't talking to me. He does sometimes do things that the Pelham Weekly considers newsworthy.
I do not teach math and science at a Highlands School in Edmonton, Alberta, and I neither run cross-country for North Queens Rural High School in Nova Scotia nor play Boys Volleyball for them. I have no joke here, I just like saying "This is Me in Grade Nine."
I am not a Major General in the Marines, and I don't command a bunch of Marine Corps pilots flying Miramar Aviator helicopters in San Diego, CA. And I definitely did not investigate the Italian Ski Gondola fiasco.
I've never worked at Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory, and I've never had any interest in Backscatter Absorption Gas Imaging. Nor have I ever worked in the Proprietary Schools section of the Texas Workforce Commission, but believe me both of those sound really fascinating.
I don't teach in the Aviation and Space Program at Oklahoma State University, and I've never ridden Boston-Montreal-Boston, but I don't think I'd mind doing either of those.
I am not a physicist in Bangkok, Thailand, and am hence ineligible for the Reverse Brain Drain association. Delongs in Thailand? Hmmm.
I did not strike out 14 in my first start for the University of Toledo Rockets on March 30, 2000. I have longer hair than that.
I'm not a member of the Coeur d'Alene Chamber of Commerce, and I don't represent the Coeur d'Alene Resort Golf Course anywhere, but I have to say that's one sportin' shirt. Yep.
I don't have a favorite recipe for a nice creamy stout, but I do like saying "Fuggles Pellets."
I don't work for Meridian Magnesium Products in Lansing, MI, but I hear they're hiring.
I never played in the Colorado Springs band Armageddon, not least because I was all of five years old when the band broke up. Nor am I a student at Cal Poly who likes to play guitar and cites Offspring as one of his influences. Although as my baby sister was kind enough to point out, I do own way too many white t-shirts, and I group them together on hangers just like him.